


Painfully Beautiful Humanity

by Alielea



Series: L and Light are Pretty (tm) [1]
Category: Death Note (Anime & Manga)
Genre: Alive L (Death Note), Alternate Universe - No Death Note, Alternate Universe - Yagami Light Is Not Kira (Death Note), Eventual L/Yagami Light, Implied L/Yagami Light, Implied lawlight, L thinks Light is pretty, Light Yagami - Freeform, M/M, Minor L/Yagami Light, Not Beta Read, Not mentioned but he's trans, POV L (Death Note), Pre-Death Note: Another Note, Trans L, We Die Like Women, lawlight, pretty gay
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-10
Updated: 2020-11-10
Packaged: 2021-03-09 00:00:30
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,197
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27485422
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Alielea/pseuds/Alielea
Summary: Throughout many years and having come across a myriad of other people- be they good, bad, or any shade of morally grey- L’s come to know that there are, often small, defining traits that makeup who exactly someone is. More often than not, those unconscious traits could even be used to separate one from the world.After working together for so long, even being chained together for some time, it’s only natural that he’s picked up on some of those small defining traits that make up who Light Yagami is.The traits that made Light up- were painfully human.And that humanity was painfully beautiful.
Relationships: L & Yagami Light, L/Yagami Light
Series: L and Light are Pretty (tm) [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2016548
Comments: 4
Kudos: 86





	Painfully Beautiful Humanity

**Author's Note:**

> Alternatively Titled: Local homosexual realizes how pretty Light Yagami would be if he were a decent person ://

Throughout many years and having come across a myriad of other people- be they good, bad, or any shade of morally grey- L’s come to know that there are, often small, defining traits that makeup who exactly someone is. More often than not, those unconscious traits could even be used to separate one from the world. 

After working together for so long, even being chained together for some time, it’s only natural that he’s picked up on some of those small defining traits that make up who Light Yagami is. 

For example, his bangs curled up whenever he ran his fingers through his hair too much- a telltale sign that he was either frustrated or overly tired- typically the former. It was a small tick that was often chastised by his father when he was caught doing so. 

L had never understood why people so frequently preferred to see the human being before seeing the way Light would sigh and run his fingers through his hair as he looked over papers. He’d make many noises while he worked, ranging from grunts to sighs, to tapping his pencil entirely too loud to clicking his pen simply for the point of getting L’s attention- only to grin at him and ask “Is everything okay, Ryuzaki?” 

Cocky bastard.

He’d notice the way his eyes lit up- going from a dark, earthly brown to a lightened, honey-like brown when the blue light from the computer monitors laid out in front of them caught his eyes just right. It was chilling. A small detail that sent what L would swear was nothing more than a chill up his spine. 

He’d also long since noticed the way his eyes would dart around the room continuously. Something L himself would do, however, his, mostly out of paranoia while Light’s was for a myriad of reasons...

He would do it when he was bored- long after L would get bored and resort to entertaining himself. Light was much more disciplined than he could ever be. 

He would do it when he voiced his often bold opinions, daring someone to challenge him in a way that strongly resembled L himself. 

He would do it when he heard unexpected noises, the sounds of things falling from L’s makeshift desk, someone clearing their throat. Anything out of the ordinary would earn a glance from Light at the very least. 

He also noticed the way he’d squint at the papers he would read. Given that Sorichiro himself wore glasses, it wasn’t out of the question that Light would need to wear reading glasses in the near future.

Light looked much younger than he did, despite a minimal age difference between the two. While L himself knew years of work and the limits he would push to keep his whatever his current alias would be took a toll on his body. Even maintaining a minimal persona now was affecting him. There was no way in hell all of the indulgent treats he’d been using to establish his character would be even slightly beneficial. 

However, Light, despite the stress of being one of the highest-scoring students in the entire country, seemed so much younger. Had he not known that the boy was eighteen- verging on nineteen- he would have assumed he was closer to sixteen. Even when he would furrow his brow, tighten his lips, and narrow his eyes- the look of what L could only assume was frustration almost made him look even younger. Like a child pouting.

Light was childish.

L was childish.

Of course, Light knew how physically attractive he was and quite often used that to his advantage. Smart, really. It was always much easier to make connections when you were a charming, personable young man such as Light. 

It was also easier to make connections when you held your heart on your sleeve as Light had the unfortunate tendency to do. Which was why L could never in good consciousness ever consider Light assisting him on the majority of his cases. 

He was much more emotional than he was given credit for. Not quite outwardly as Misa Amane who allowed herself to be read very easily when she desired to be. But there were small cues that gave away his emotions that, once learned, revealed just how emotional the young man could be. 

Easily attached as well. It showed whenever he had accused miss Amane of being so loyal to Kira simply because he had avenged her parent’s death. The way his brows furrowed into a pitying look and his lips had tightened, eyes finding the girl on the monitor where she sat back on her chair, eyes covered and hands bound at her sides. 

All in all, good traits to have for a dedicated and halfway decent detective. After all, what good was an investigator who couldn’t give a damn about whatever case they worked on?

It seemed to be a fatal flaw that ran in the family. 

He’d noticed his hands as well. 

Well, he’d noticed his right hand first. Initially, only whenever Light would reach over to snatch papers or folders out of his eyes, occasionally when he’d grip onto his shoulder and lean over to read over his shoulder- a trait L despised, he’d always hated whenever someone would lean over him or try to read over his shoulder. 

His right hand had all sorts of callouses over it. Clearly, he was active. His fourth finger had a callous that his others didn’t that gave away just how much he’d been writing in the semester. 

However, contrary to what his hands would suggest, Light’s touches were much softer. He’d interlock their fingers occasionally, offering short-lived, barely-there squeezes. A silent, comfortable form of intimacy.

His left hand’s palm had many callouses that mirrored his right hands from his athletics. Also like his right hand, the tips of his fingers had callouses from hours sitting in front of computer screens and sorting through papers. 

Of course, those were hardly noticeable. Light was always seemingly careful with his hands, as he was about everything. 

Light had always been a perfectionist. Conscious of everything and everyone around him. A trait L both adored and despised, mirroring his own nature too closely. 

However, despite the perfection Light craved, there were always small cracks in that facade that L picked up on so easily. Small details that made him painfully human. His arrogance. His ego. His self-absorption translated to feeling entitled to pass often harsh judgment onto others due to his advanced intelligence. Confidence that could only be found in young men that would be beaten out of his as he got older. 

Prior to meeting Light, L had always been baffled by the concept of finding humanity in itself beautiful. Humanity was ugly, broken, depraved, and corrupted. The very flaws that so many people scramble to hide. However, the traits that made Light up- the large, self-defining aspects that largely make up who we are as we attempt to present fully as ourselves to society and the small, often private, and unconscious characteristics that we’re unaware of traits- were painfully human. 

And that humanity was painfully beautiful.

**Author's Note:**

> Instagram: @Bit.bugg   
> Comments are appreciated <3
> 
> Also! Let me know if you'd like one from Light's perspective as well because y'know. L's kinda pretty too...


End file.
